mandaloo . com

been fighting a sore throat the last two days… it’s all gross-sinus-drainage related and i think it’s on the upswing of getting better (thank you, tylenol allergy/sore throat medication!). worked and came home … and managed to crash for four hours straight. man oh man… i sure needed that. plans for tomorrow include going to my brother’s cosmetology school and letting him practice doing stuff on me, going shopping for clothes, and dinner with pam. plans for sunday include church in the morning and then joshua’s first birthday party in the afternoon. should be a nice weekend.

jeromy takes his concealed handgun license class tomorrow with daddy and hambone. all three of them cooped up in a class for eight hours spells trouble. heh.

i’ve been down this week. not totally depressed by any means… but just battling some internal issues. i’ve been seeing nothing but mandy flaws lately and it’s been discouraging. i don’t want to become a person that i’m not and it sometimes feels like an uphill battle when certain events are all clumped together. but then i remember that some of the people god utilized most in the scriptures were some of the most unlikely characters that were anything but perfect. and that alone gives me hope that maybe this is just an interim and learning experience to take me to the next level (assuming i do my part to grow).

jeromy’s been having tons of migraines and headaches lately. i knew it was bad when he told me that he made a doctor’s appointment (something that is usually never done). he went to the doc today and got some medicine that should hopefully help the poor guy out.

i’m going to san angelo in a couple of weekends… jeromy’s coming, too. it’s for a wedding we’re shooting (for an old friend of mine, actually) that should be tons of fun. i’m also looking forward to just getting away and being on an open road and stuff. when jeromy and i started dating, we would pile up in his truck and just drive. we had many awesome conversations in that truck and we’d go all over the metroplex on any given night. the new car is going to get broken in soon…

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long time since i’ve updated… lots of stuffs going on.

big news… i am no longer a vw bug driver. well… technically, i haven’t been one since early january since it decided to pop a timing belt. i’ve been driving my mom’s car since (a late-90s toyota camry) and have missed having my own vehicle. last weekend, jeromy and i got a 2008 scion xd… it’s a sweet little thing and i looooooooove driving it. i usually hate driving but everything in this car is just so friggin’ fun. we got the upgraded sound package, which means my tunes sound sa-weet. pics to come. it was nice to give mom’s car back to her. she never complained once and it meant the world to me that she let us borrow her car for four months. i gave the camry back to her with a full tank, fresh oil change, and it had it washed and detailed. she was pretty tickled and said that it hadn’t been that clean since they bought it. heh. i seriously love that woman. i hate taking help from people, and it’s bugged me that i’ve had to do it this long… but her chipper attitude and non-keeping-score-of-the-situation touched me. i don’t think she realizes how much it meant… but that’s what good moms are all about.

i’ve been working hard and have been tired lately. but there are a lot of big items (not having a car, etc.) that are quickly getting checked off the list and it’s nice to have a little mindspace freed up so i am not stressing as much. the only odd thing is that i’m so sleepy all the time. i’m wiped out by 9 most days and it takes me less than two minutes to fall into a deep sleep. i’ve been having reoccurring nightmares, too, which has not helped. i just need to refocus on my health and start eating better/moving around more so that i’m not so physically spent at the end of every day.

this weekend is mother’s day. we’re going to head to mom’s on sunday and have dinner with the gang. tomorrow, i have a senior portrait shoot in the morning and then a birthday party for a friend in the afternoon. i think we’re having a stars watching cookout on saturday evening. hopefully, the stars can pull out a win and not repeat last night’s disaster game. man… that was painful to watch.

the album i ordered came in this week and it looks amazing. i love it. i was able to bring it along to a consult this week and the potential client had a positive reaction to it as well. hooray! i’m hoping to get on the stick and maybe make one for jeromy’s and my wedding… which i actually need to print photos from soon.

i had my trash the dress session with our wedding photographer last weekend. from what i saw on his screen, the shots are going to turn out ammmmaaaazzziiinnnggg. they were so pretty, i couldn’t believe it was me. we went to grapevine lake for the session and the wind was all crazy - which whipped up my long veil into a frenzy of activity and made for some killer pictures. i can’t wait…

not much else going on. jeromy’s taking a chl class next saturday. i think daddy’s going to go, too. alan is liking cosmetology school. i’m actually going up there next week for “free family day.” he has to do certain procedures a certain number of times before he can get certified in it, so mom and i are going to go and get things done like pedicures, brow waxing, etc. i’m glad that he’s doing so well at it so far and that he seems to really like it.

that’s all i know so far. i hope that everyone has a great mother’s day!

i’ve been toying around with ordering a blurb album for a while now and i finally got on the stick and ordered one today. i have taken a mix of red brick photos and combined them with lyrics of some of my favorite love songs… and voila! if you want to check a preview of the book out, you can go to:

Lyrics of Love

By Red Brick Photography

Book Preview

it should be here in a couple of weeks. if i like the quality and all, i’m hoping to do one for jeromy’s and my wedding. it’d be cool to combine it with some of the lyrics from songs we played during our wedding/reception and all.

today jeromy and i took it easy. well… kinda. i’ve been working on photo edits and red brick stuff all day. i’m trying to take things to the next level… improve my services and branding. i’m going to have a friend work with me to develop a good logo so i can do a better job of making a consistent image. my welcome packets are going to get an upgrade as well. crazy fun.

it was nice to just bum around and stay in. i’ve been exhausted by interactions lately. over the last two months, there have been several events in which i’ve had to just “get over it.” it has ranged from things outside my control that were clearly wrong and crossed the line to more minor issues that i’ve tried to clear up before they got worse. i’m starting to feel that i must be an ineffective communicator. there have been a couple of conversations lately in which i have been unable to clearly convey my feelings and where they were coming from. in any case, there have been misinterpretations and i’m left with not much of an option but to just move on once the situation nullifies itself. and it’s fine… but it has left me feeling a bit anti social. nothing seems simple anymore.

i’m a big believer in “say what you mean and do what you say.” when the two start to conflict, i become confused at what someone’s intentions might be. there are some actions that i have seen this year that have clearly shown me the character of those behind them. and i have let things stew and the resulting frustration took a toll on me. so when other experiences have come up, i had decided that it was best to nip things in the bud and be completely up front and honest so that i’m not holding in negativity and can give someone an opportunity to show me how i might be misinterpreting a situation. it has become very apparent that i suck at this. as someone who grew up hating any type of conflict, i haven’t had much practice expressing my views when it comes to situations that arise that may cause for hurt feelings. it leaves me wondering if the old, silent way was better - by the time i come up with the right words to say, it’s always too late and it feels like i’m beating a dead horse.

my little brother starts cosmetology school next week. i’m keeping my fingers crossed that he finds something he truly loves doing - whether it’s skin, hair, etc. he needs confidence and some sort of sign that life really can rock. he’s a special guy with a heart as big as can be. i hope that this opportunity will give him a chance to shine.

jeromy’s making a rocket. yes… think lots of pipe, a two-liter bottle, and an air pump. i’m anticipating that he’ll need to go to the emergency room tomorrow. i’ve already had to get on to him for shooting it in the house. silly boys…

i ended my last post saying that i was bummed that i didn’t spend more time with my family. jeromy left for out of town last wednesday and that evening (technically early thursday morning), there was a massive storm that came through the area. trees were knocked over, signs down, electricity out, etc. i heard that there was a confirmed tornado less than a mile from my house. whether there was or wasn’t… there was sure a lot of damaging winds. the schools were closed and when i drove through the streets, it looked crazy. powerlines down, glass… everything. thankfully, our house is fine. jeromy’s sister’s house had their fence knocked down, so that sucks. the electricity was off and on during thursday, so i decided to spend the night at my mom’s on thursday and friday night. it was really nice to hang out and be with everyone. there were some pivotal conversations and a touching moment between me and my dad. i really love my family and when i left on saturday, there were actually tears in my eyes. i miss them and i feel bad that i don’t make it over there more often. i’ve always loved my family but i’ve been especially touched and impressed with them in the recent months. i feel their love and they genuinely love jeromy. there is a peace that i haven’t really had before and it’s nice.

the dallas stars have won their first two games in the playoffs. i can only hope that they will maintain their momentum. the next game is tomorrow night… i hope that they show it on the tvs in the bowling alley tomorrow night (since we have league nights on tuesdays).

jeromy is at his second training for the citizens fire academy right now. i’m glad that he’s getting to do this and look forward to hearing what he learned tonight. poor guy worked his butt off last week/weekend. he was exhausted when he got back into town saturday evening. i know he’ll be pooped when he gets home tonight. it’s so great to have such a hardworking guy in my life. i am smitten and it seems like things between us just get better and better (even though it’s hard to imagine an increase on what we already have). we live for each other and we both know it.

i’ve been mildly nauseated all day today. this morning, i woke up feeling like i had to throw up (but thankfully never did). nothing seemed appetizing and the thought/smell of food made me want to lose it today until this evening where i managed to get down a sandwich. i hope i feel better tomorrow. i was wired all last night and couldn’t sleep so that probably contributed to me not feeling well. i’m not as bad as i was earlier today, but the constant lull of nausea is still there. blech.

have you ever felt like god was tugging at your heart but you didn’t know why? i’ve been feeling that way lately and i’m trying to examine what it might be related to. i need to do a better job of leaving some quiet space in my head and heart so that god’s influence has a little more wiggle room to be heard. i’m super good about crowding my life with distractions and noise and such and forget to leave pieces available for higher things (although i don’t intentionally mean to do this). but there’s something going on that i need to be paying attention to…

you know the charmin toilet paper commercials with the cartoon bears? they freak me out and make me uncomfortable. i don’t know why… they’re harmless animated bears but if i could ban one type of commercial, that is what it would be. yep.

i need to hit the sack soon… i have a breakfast meeting in frisco at 7 a.m. tomorrow… which means i need to leave the house by 6 a.m. yikes. nighty night. hopefully i’ll wake up not feeling so green…

somehow, i’ve been lightening emotional loads over the last couple of weeks. it seems that slowly and surely, some clouding issues are clearing up and sunny days are ahead. simple things like getting out of my apartment, doing taxes, clearing up communication issues, etc. have all been concentrated in the last week or so. god has given me some interesting opportunities to improve my character and instead of focusing on certain situations (like i have been), i finally manned up. somehow, the looming feeling or “overwhelm” is melting away and it’s pretty awesome.

jeromy is going to be out of town for a while and i already miss him terribly. i think i’m about to head over to jenny and josh’s to hang for a bit. i’m aiming to get to bed early since i’ve been falling to sleep past midnight for the last few days.

tv sucks and rots my brain. really. i am a horrible daughter. i don’t see my family nearly as much as i would like. i need to do better at that. it’s the next thing on my list.

my nose has been running for over a week. seriously. if this keeps up, i may have to go to the doctor. it’s just dumb bc i really don’t feel all that bad… i’m just friggin’ congested all the time. bleh. and my throat keeps needing to be cleared. which means i’ve been a blast to have in meetings and in presentations all this week.

the above photo is of the mississippi river when i flew over it earlier this week. on tuesday, i flew to st. louis for work, drove to edwardsville (in illinois), looked at a site, drove back to the airport, and flew home. today (thursday) was a 13 hour day. monday and wednesday have been busy as well. and that’s not all that bad, but i have a super mega crazy action-packed weekend ahead. i need to clean jeromy’s and my apartments since the last day of both our leases is monday. wedding shoot on saturday. then some portfolio shots for a model on sunday. my mom and grandmother have been telling me that i need to start slowing down a little. i’m starting to think that they are right. and i know i probably sound like a broken record to them, but i think it’ll get more manageable in april or may. i’m not booking as many weddings as i could be just so that i can keep a good number of weekends open for jeromy and i to enjoy together. i’m looking forward to getting his stuff unpacked and integrated into the house so it starts looking like a home rather than a dump site for boxes and sparsely placed furniture.

jeromy and i have been married for almost a month. it seriously feels like it’s just been a week. i remember the wedding vividly. i got my new name plate for work this week and it’s a great feeling to see it.

besides all the boring life stuff above, there has been a lot going on in the background of jeromy’s and my lives. a lot of changes and shifts and realignments, of sorts. and it’s been interesting to observe, to be honest. at this point, i can honestly say that very little would surprise us right now - it’s been that kind of month. jeromy and i have had some meaningful, long conversations in the evenings and i’m comforted that i’ve married a man that is so open with his feelings and thoughts. in some ways, exposed vulnerabilities have allowed me to get to know my husband in a way i never have before. and while the circumstances behind the various situations may not have been things that i and/or he would have preferred, the silver lining has been that we’ve truly been able to emotionally bond on a new level right off the bat in our marriage.

how’d it get to be 10:00 already? time for bed. wash, rinse, repeat.

to see our online gallery, go to:

http://littrellphotography.net
Album: Jeromy and Mandy
Password: lackey022908

note: album is only up until August 18, 2008

“In the end of the sabbath, as it began to dawn toward the first day of the week, came Mary Magdalene and the other Mary to see the sepulchre. And, behold, there was a great earthquake: for the bangel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door, and sat upon it. His bcountenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow: And for fear of him the keepers did shake, and became as dead men. And the angel answered and said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified. He is not here: for he is arisen, as he said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay. And go quickly, and tell his disciples that he is risen from the dead; and, behold, he goeth before you into Galilee; there shall ye see him: lo, I have told you. And they departed quickly from the sepulchre with fear and great joy; and did run to bring his disciples word.” ~Matthew 28:1-8

it is our responsibility with great joy to spread the word to those who need hope and love in their lives. and our lives should reflect this good news. there is much reason to have joy - christ lives and is our savior. he is the answer to our pains, fears, and trials and he has conquered death.

i’m delighted to say that jeromy and i get to spend the evening with some of the most special people in the world - my family. i’ve recently become overwhelmed with gratitude for them and have had some neat experiences lately.

happy easter, all.

woke up this morning with two baseballs in my throat… or that’s what it felt like. stayed home from work and was glad i did… fever, drainage, the whole sha-bang. jeromy is out replenishing the supply of kleenex and getting food. he’s my little rain slicker from the woes and storms of life. i guess we’ve been going back and forth on that… he’s been blue due to some issues right now and it’s been nice to be each other’s support. i may feel like crap. my throat may be unable to swallow because it hurts too bad. the house may be messy, i’m behind in work, and my to do list may be ridiculously long. but you know what? today still is awesome bc i am married to my best friend and i know he loves me more than anything. cheesy? perhaps. but it is how i honestly feel. and it’s funny but every day after the wedding has been the best day of my life since it all just gets better and better. even though i’ve known jeromy over the past two and half years (and we’ve spent most of our time together), i love getting to know him even better. new doors have been opened for us and i’ve enjoyed learning more and more about my soul mate. and it makes me fall in love all over again. i’ve never been able to be this “at ease” with anyone in my entire existence. it’s nice. i’m changed.

i get to go to illinois for work next week. rawk. i’ll only be there for a day, but it should be fun.

day time tv sucks. i get lassoed into the most mind-numbing, dumb shows. the only thing worse are the stupid commercials that show during them.

crazy rains yesterday… maybe they’ll revive the yard.

tight game going on with the stars and ducks… gonna finish watching and go to bed. ‘night.